i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize