"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
and she was petting her beer can
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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