At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
