Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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