Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
