How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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