I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
