did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
