WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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