this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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