god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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