do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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