We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
