I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Farmville is her only friend.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
