Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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