well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
