He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
