This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize