Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
