Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
