Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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