Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
