well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
You're earring is so big in my mouth
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Randomize
