Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
