A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
