when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize