found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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