That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
