break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
