quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
