you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
