You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
