we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
