just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
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