So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize
