Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
well you can't waste a boner
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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