i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
