I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
