so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize
