He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
one might say we're banned from that church
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
