hotel room ftw
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
