Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
