Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
