Sry I called you an 8
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
of course. lets lasso hookers.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
