If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
