you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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