My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize