i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
