the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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