yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize