okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
