Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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