Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
