this boner is exhausting
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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